People often ask me questions about perfectionism. What is it, why do people tend to be perfectionist, what is being perfect. Well let me start with some basic definitions. The word, "perfection" derives from the Latin word "perfectio", and "perfect" from "perfectus". These expressions in turn come from "perficio" which means "to finish", "to bring to an end." "Perfectio(n)" thus literally means "a finishing", and "perfect(us)" "finished", much as in grammatical parlance "perfect sense" . Perfection is, broadly, a state of completeness and flawlessness. A perfectionist is someone who follows the principles of perfectionism.
To give you a good idea of perfectionism let me give you an example that helps me and hope it helps you as well. William Shakespeare, an English poet and a playwright is considered one of the greatest writers in the English Language. He wrote about 38 plays. For any playwright he is considered as a symbol of perfection. People say that the world never produced a great English writer than him. Out of those 38 plays that he wrote, the commonly reproduced are about 5 to 6 plays which include « hamlet, Romeo & Juliet, etc». Other are great plays too but these ones are really that have resonated down the ages and are a must read. So out of 38 plays we have a success rate of about 6 plays which turns out to be roughly 15 percent. So for someone so great as Shakespeare we have a success rate of about 15 percent. Take Charles Dickens, considered one of the English language's greatest novel writers wrote about 17 novels out of which 5 are considered the greatest hits like « a tale of two cities, bleak house, Oliver twist, David Copperfield » so here we have a success rate of 30 percent.
So the point is there are far more failures in this world than success. Perfectionism means flawlessness and completeness that corresponds to hundred percent success rates. So if I need to be a perfect writer i need to be 6 times better than Shakespeare and about 4 times better than Dickens. Now this is not really realistic is it. The definition of Perfectionism itself gives us a standard that is not realistic at all. So the question is why do people believe in perfectionism? why do people create these standards ? There are some standards which are developed empirically. These are standards based on reasons, facts and are realistic. For example a normal human being can live up to 50 – 90 years depending upon location. SO if i say that i can live up to 60 then that would be a reasonable standard. Then there are standards which are invented out of nowhere are cannot be justified. They can be developed on the basis of ideologies, beliefs or religion. For example according to the Bible Methuselah lived for about 969 years and if I start comparing myself to that standard then that’s not realistic.
So if I invent standards that are not achievable then perhaps I created them so that I can attack those people who can’t come up to those standards. It’s perhaps a justification to criticize others. A baby can’t hold a glass of water; one has to help the baby drink. So if we start excepting a baby to handle properly a glass of water, it’s totally unrealistic. We are setting a standard that is not achievable.
Perfectionism rarely leads to happiness. Perfectionists pay a very heavy price and that price is happiness. In attaining their goals they go so deep that forget the real motive. While writing this blog I can spend days on it to make it the perfect blog on perfectionism that deals with everything on perfectionism. But that would make it so long that perhaps nobody would read it till the end. So forget perfectionism, set yourselves standards that are realistic. Go out, do what you want to do, make mistakes, that’s how you would learn in life.
References:
- Hurka, Thomas (1993) Perfectioinsm, Oxford university Press
- Mr. Molyneux - freedomain Radio
